i love myself so much that i took the leap
and had my first art market today
with all my paintings
and i didn’t sell a single thing
but i had the most wonderful day anyway

i love that my day was joyous and simple in my market day camping chair
that i fell deeply into MISTS OF AVALON
ate delicious vegetarian rice paper rolls
drank apple cider lemonade
and listened to the gorgeous busker near me who sang my favourite songs all day
i love that i loved this

and i love that i don’t feel erred by it
don’t feel stuck or sad or confused
i just feel peace because i know i’m doing a loving, conscious thing anyway
and that art pours from my soul
and that it is invaluable,
even if nobody buys it on a really slow market day.

i love that i am being what my own best friend would do to me ~
stroking my hair, arms wrapped around me,
you don’t need to explain anything away
you are just as you are, and that is the most beautiful thing of all.

i love that i know now more than ever
that success has nothing to do with it
whether one painting sells, the whole lot, or none at all
the fact that i still am radiating
that i still am going to create
is beauty enough. that is success and that is love of the divine.

i will go back to the markets again
and i will enjoy my day
and everything will be JUST FINE
even if it reveals to me that markets aren’t for me,
if they are partly for me,
or not at all,
i have a deep feeling that divine spirit has a grand plan for me.

i love you leonie
i married you under that rock four months ago
i promised i would remember to love you no matter what
and i DO
i promised to honour your highest truth
and i DO
sometimes it scares the shit out of me,
but we leap together holding hands.
i cradle you gently when we feel soft and messy and out of sorts,
i love you just as you are,
and i will continue to.

the highest spirit