Why I Married Myself

It’s the eve of my birthday.

The perfect time to write this, and share this with you.

Some years ago, I married myself.

Yup, it’s true.

I was in the most beautiful, sacred women’s circle… that circle was really the place where everything began for me. It felt like coming home. Instant soul’s home. And I knew I’d continue doing this kind of women’s work for the rest of my life.

Anyways, as part of this circle, I was introduced to the concept of inner marriage.

How we really need to choose to love, honour + cherish ourselves before we commit to doing the same for another.

It made perfect sense to me. Even though I had already found my love, I wanted to marry me before I married him.

So I proposed to myself inwardly. I accepted. We set the date.

I invited my dear sister-of-heart-and-spirit Deb to officiate the ceremony. I invited women I knew off the internet to be goddesses of honour – one of whom ended up becoming my best mate. It was best-mate-at-first-sight.

We went up into the mountains under a huge beautiful rock.

And there I said the words that have gone on to shape the rest of my life:

Leonie, I love you.

I choose to cherish you for the rest of my days.

I choose to honour you, and be your best friend.

Can you imagine what it is like to speak these words to your own self?

It’s the greatest relief. The love and approval you’ve been looking for all along.

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Summer McStravick wanted me to speak about my inner marriage during her Shakti Summit 2014.

It ended up being this deeply moving hour of sharing, woman stories, self love + body acceptance.

When we recorded this, my grandmother was dying. We spoke about my grandmother, and I spoke a prayer for her body that had carried her through so many adventures and journeys in her 97 years on the planet.

When I hung up the phone, both Summer and I were teary from what had transpired.

The phone rang moments later.

It was my Dad.

My grandmother had passed over.

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And so I offer this recording to you.

About a woman who learned to love herself first.

About a grandmother who was heading home.

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LISTEN HERE:

You can listen by pressing play using the above player or click to download here.

With oodles of love + galoshes of joy,