smiling at the sun, christmas 2005

“and while you wonder
how’s this gonna end
i only wanted to begin”

~ ben lee, begin
(from the brilliant album “awake is the new sleep”

I listen to these words
and I think
What if?
What if I’m spending all my time thinking about what I need and want to be happy ~
I’m thinking I’m Not Here until I’m The Artist, The Book Author, The Photographer, The Book Touring Retreat Giving Workshop Goddess.
And I’m wondering about how it will all end,
When the real delight, the real truth,
Is that I Just Wanted to Be Here,
and I Just Wanted To Be Me.

And this Earth journey,
it’s the biggest trip,
the greatest discovery,
so long and obtuse and curvy,
that sometimes I forget I’m here for an adventure
and that being here
is what I really wanted.


P.S. I know it’s true because when I say:
Being here
is what I really wanted
a little part of me soars and spins with delight.