Should You Hire A Friend In Your Business?

Dearests,

If you’re asking this question, you’re not going to like my answer.

Don’t hire your friend unless you’re really, really happy to lose their friendship.

I speak from sad, hard experience. I’ve hired 3 friends over the years. Friends I genuinely loved & would never imagine it would end in heartbreak. I lost those friendships entirely.

I’m not alone in this experience. I’ve coached thousands of business owners over the years. The story is depressingly similar. In 99.99% of situations, it’s a trainwreck.

The issue is, we as humans always believe that we’re in the 0.01% percent that WILL work. That hiring that one specific friend will be phenomenal idea & will be SO MUCH FUN!!!

Here’s the issue though:
Hiring your friend creates a power imbalance. You as CEO will ultimately mean you will need to make decisions they won’t always agree with.

They may begin to feel resentful towards you for the benefits of being the business owner without seeing the challenges & responsibilities.

Your loyalty to them as a friend has to come second to your responsibility as a business owner to keep the business going, pay your friend & meet its financial & client commitments.

Differences in opinions, communication styles, work ethic, emotional maturity & commitment become incredibly intensified. What worked as friends almost always doesn’t work as boss/employee.

Any feedback to them can come across as a personal attack. Your friend’s stress levels increase because suddenly their livelihood feels at risk.

You start avoiding the hard stuff because you don’t want to damage the relationship. And that avoidance damages the business AND the relationship anyway.

I spent thousands of dollars on coaches, advice, management programs & mediation sessions to try to make it work. It still ended in losing the friendship.

I’ve heard other business coaches talk about hiring friends & how well it works because of their superior emotional intelligence skills. And then… a year later… they experience the devastating friendship break-up.

(I’m sure I was insufferable with my advice about this too when I hadn’t experienced the hard part yet!)

Before you go into business with someone, or hire a friend, ask yourself this: Would I marry this person?

THAT is how seriously you need to consider this decision.

If the answer is NO, DO NOT hire.

If the answer is YES, you still need to proceed with extreme caution, excellent boundaries & a rock-solid contract.

Imagine having to give your best friend a formal written warning because you are in danger of losing your business entirely. Does the thought make you squeamish? You’re not ready to hire a friend.

I tell you all this as your business big sister who has already made that mistake & would LOVE for you not to experience the same kind of heartbreak & grief.

Big love,
Leonie
xoxo