who will i be
when i am not what anybody else wants me to be?
who am i
when i am not trying to make others feel better?
who am i
when i am not overflowing with love or trust?
why am i
here learning this lesson
at this time
right now?

i ask questions long into the morning,
eclipsing into the moon night.
i scavenge for the answers,
in myself, in the unknown, in the world out there.

i have fear and courage in bundles.
i am writing my way out of despair everyday
finding my way back into the light.
i walk a labyrinth of words.

i have curled up into myself
licking at my wounds
blood and scabs
of grace and anger and tenderness.

i am snake like, i am bear like,
i am the owl shrieking in the trees
i am the silence
and i am the wake.

i am brave,
i am rage,
i am kindness,
i am gladness.

spirit seems close by
rumbling in my chest
and a thousand miles away
a thunderstorm in the mountains.

who am i
when i no longer have to point out the good points
holding out the sacrosanct, gleaming diamond of insight
the compass of having it all worked out hanging by a red thread around my neck?

who am i
when i refuse to pass bullshit past my tongue?
when i do not clamour for the easy answer,
do not grasp for the obvious,
do not eat the trail mix of others’ journeys,
do not compromise truth
or settle for the misshapen shapes of what something SHOULD look like?

who am i
when i am not
but myself?

this must be walking the path of authenticity.

I am dancing into the wind again until mid-April.
Off to roll and laugh in the dirt like an emu,
Swim in a creek with my highschool posse of girls,
Witness (and photograph) one of my dearest friends wed her beloved,
Hitchhike with friends-I-haven’t-met-yet to be with my family for Easter,
Make my sister paint with her hands (and feet),
and just…

be me.

May your days always be blessed with the honouring of your own truth ~