I have a message for you this morning.
I want you to know that all your feelings are allowed and okay.
Not just the good ones, not just the “positive” ones. Allowing yourself to feel all your feelings does NOT mean you will “attract” “negative” experiences. I believe that is one of the most harmful myths in New Age ideology. Constantly brainwashing yourself to only say positive things and feeling guilty when you don’t is not healthy, truthful and it doesn’t allow us to feel at home in our bodies.
You are allowed to feel alllllllll your feelings.
You don’t have to deny one piece of yourself. This is “wholehearted” living, as Brene Brown would call it, and it’s the word that resonates most with me for this.
And I need to be super honest here — I come to this the hard way of learning it.
For most of my life I positive-thought my way out of everything. And when I was 27, it all crashed down around me. I had crippling post natal depression and anxiety from crushing down the truth inside me. The truth was that I was very angry, and very broken, and very damaged from many, many things – things that were happening then, things that had happened in my childhood.
Through sheer necessity, I started talking about the things that weren’t okay with me.
Started telling my husband, my counsellor, my intuitive healer. I slowly, slowly expanded the circle of telling to my dearest friends. The trusting and vulnerability courage grew at glacial rates. It is still growing.
Today, I’m committed to truth-telling and whole-hearted living.
It is not easy. But it is better than stuffing down all my feelings and only being okay with the “positive” ones.
So much more to say on this, but my kids are feeling all their feelings and need some help with that right now.
I just wanted you to know that you’re okay.
Your feelings are all okay.
I love you.
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