this too will pass… the cycle of seasons goddess…

Hola dearest hearts,

This week has turned into the most profound sharings about moving through dark nights of the soul. It started with a love letter, than some sharings on finding your way through the night.

If you haven’t already, read them. And read the precious comments. My heart is filled with the stories of your journeys, your bravery, vulnerability, your lioness strengths, your transformation and your wisdom.

This will be the wrap-up post of all the things I have found help me get through dark nights of the soul. Signposts of healing, if you will.

Didjawanna assume listening position? (Mine is legs crossed, elbows on knees, chin in hands). Please pass around the towering stack of gluten free chocolate flaxseed banana date and coconut pancakes. (Yes, I did just make some for me and Chris’ adorable aunt. Deeeevine! Restorative!)

Now where was I?

Oh yes…

Some more things I want to share that have helped me through dark nights of the soul…

The answer is green.

No, really.
When I’m feeling really off, out of kilter, drained, fuzzy, toxic and blergergyukbluk?
Chances are I’ve been eating crap food.
Fastest way to remedy that?
Have a green smoothie.
I would say I get at least a 30% mood boost whenever I have one.
Green stuff brings us back into alignment again. Helps our bodies become less acidic. And corrects yucky mood swings from sugar imbalances.
I always try to remember to blend up a new green mood when I’m feeling sucky. They really should try and repackage that stuff as mood lifters!

What if I don’t know it all?

I don’t possibly know how things will work out.
I don’t know if things are truly bad or if they are angels in very, very bad disguise.

Remember that post that the worst thing in the world could be the best thing?
Yus. It’s true.
Sometimes sucky sucky things happen.
But who knows where they are leading you?
They may be taking you to the place you need to be, and shaping you into the soul you were born to be.

And the thing is, you don’t find that out until you are there.
Aaaah, the sweet blessing of hindsight.
What if you were just waiting for enough time and distance to look back in your rear vision mirror to see the miracle there?

And I wanted to share another story of how this works.

Right around Christmas and New Years, I was going through a really rough patch. I was pregnacious and we’d just bought my grandmother’s cottage. (Can anyone say yippee second mortgage and just about to go on maternity leave? holy freakout batman!) And then we had a little something I term lovingly as “The Tenants From Hell.”. The kind you can only laugh about later, much later, after everything is over. But yes. During that time, my mama received quite a few phonecalls from a sobbing, swearing Leonie who couldn’t work out why things were just so awful awful awful. And my mama would listen. And then remind me gently

Leonie, I don’t know how or why, but it will all work out the way it is meant to.

And I didn’t believe it then. It was only after we got The Loveliest Tenants In The World, Little Mermaid was born, and we knew with an urgency we needed to move home that we realised how perfect the timing all was. It was exactly what we needed in able to move home. And moving home? It’s the greatest miracle that could possibly be.

And it’s really, really worth The Tenants From Hell.

The blessing and the miracle that came after them – and because of them – makes it utterly worth it.

If only I could have known that back when it was happening. Instead, I had to fall back into Trust and Faith as much as I could.

Just remember… The worst thing in the world could be a miracle in the rear vision mirror.

Healing medication

Another thing that has got me through dark nights of the soul… this might be a little controversial, but I’m only sharing what has worked for me.

I went through a time I called my grey period. I just couldn’t seem to see through the grey. There was a lot of stuff happening around me and in my life. It was just getting too hard and too sad and too exhausting. I felt like I was bottoming out.

I went to talk to my doctor, and took anti-depressants for the next six months. The way I explained it – it didn’t make me happy. The medication just stopped me from bottoming out. I went to a therapist, and some of the life-stressors that had been happening ended. And in time, I didn’t need that support anymore.

I’ve also had loved ones use medication to help them navigate through anxiety, break-ups and depression. They’ve used medication as an extra support while they also tried other healing methods, therapy and making lifestyle changes. I’m really grateful for the way medication can be an extra support to give us the time to right our keel.

Acupuncture

I went to get acupuncture to help Lil Mermaid turn from breech position. And while I was there, the lovely blue eyed acupuncturist said: Are you really anxious? It’s showing up in your pulse. And I was. As evidenced by my bursting into tears at his question. Tenants From Hell had reaaally not helped by that point.

Don’t worry. I’ll fix that while you are here.

he said kindly.

And he did. As soon as he placed the needles in, I could feel the anxiety pooling into liquid metal, and begin flowing out of my body. Within five minutes, I was grinning madly at Chris, telling him how wonderful I felt. After the session, I walked to the car saying over and over again:

After feeling terrible all this time, I can’t believe it only took this one session to feel wonderful again!

Acupuncture = best ever double high five.

Seeking guidance

And the thing I always do when I feel like I’ve lost my way?

I seek guidance. I get a healing. I get a reading.

Someone else’s guidance, perspective and energy can make a huge difference.

Recommendations? I’m currently not offering Goddess Guidance sessions. But I can recommend Akiah, Fabeku, Brenton, Hiro, Lucy and Tanishka.

And my last piece of advice?

I turned to the strongest woman I know.
A woman who has lost her father, two brothers and a son. Who was a single mum for many years. Who has endured heartache, pain and financial hardship again and again. A woman who is incredibly strong and joyful – not in spite of it all – but because of it all.

What do I tell someone who is hurting?
I ask her.

Tell them it’s all going to be okay. That they are more than this. That this moment will pass. That they are bigger than just the things they own and lose. That they will become who they are meant to be. That they will get stronger and braver. That all this stuff will pass, and everyday just gets better and better and more amazing.

And with that, she laughs that shimmering, hearty belly laugh of hers. A laugh that is born out of a well loved, deep lived life.

And tell them to laugh as much as they can. And talk to an old person. They’ve been through it all, they know the way.

Amen.

Wherever you are at dearest heart, I want you to know you are loved. That miracles are possible. That everything will be okay. That one day you will look back on this and be filled with Grace and Ease and Faith and Joy. And that I love you. As do a hundred thousand more. That you have angels. That you are not alone. That this is all for something. That everyday we are becoming stronger, wiser, gentler, more loving, more compassionate, more understanding. We are becoming the souls we wanted to be. We are becoming our better selves. This will all be worth it my love. I believe in you.

Big love, you can do it,