All sorrows can be borne if you tell a story about them.
– Karen Blixen
By telling our truth we make way for more beauty in our lives.
We all have secrets of our selves, secrets we fear and are held under by…
We fear what people will think if they knew, and spend so much time trying to cover a perceived flaw or secret.
I know because I’ve done it.
Felt so many years worrying because…. *drum roll*
I have uneven boobs!
Years spent feeling like I wasn’t a full woman because of this “flaw”
So many moments feeling negatively about my body,
and keeping the secret so close to my chest (literally)
that it weighed on me.
I have decided to no longer honour the secret of it.
No longer honour the shame or the fear or the worry.
Instead, I will honour acceptance and self love and truth.
Yesterday, I emailed my sweet girls ~
Deb, Lile and Sally after getting back from our lush lunch.
And I said to them…
I need to share my secret. So I did. Without fear.
I gave out self love, and love came flooding back.
Love, acceptance, friendship, wisdom, reassurances, warmth, laughter.
I am letting the “secret” be a truth,
a conquered fear,
an integral, loved part of me.
I am letting my worry fly off into ze sky,
and am bobbing on the ocean gleefully with uneven boozwa’s
My choice: I refuse to be weighed down by my fears anymore!
Bob, bob, bob!
I will honour my body, just as it is,
not how I wish it were.
Honour my healthy, assymetrical body
honouring its “perceived flaws” ~
honouring its perfect creation.
Two photos I fell in love with today…
The beautiful Deb celebrating her first Maui sunset…
A photo Deb took of me taking a photo of her at our surprise picnic on Friday…
Me and Lile had a lovely lunch hour today.
Using office stationery, and bits and bobs we had living in the bottoms of our bags,
we had “Craft Corner” ~
we set up at one of the meeting tables and made cards and drew and made like creative bugs for an hour.
It was absolutely lovely.
Beautiful mediation website found here.
Has 1, 2, 3 minute guided meditation words with music and imagery.
My breathing deepened when I read these.
What has touched me today?
Finding out from my little sister that she, my mum and my brother all cried when they read the post about connecting with clinty.
Who do I miss today?
Sonia, Kasey, Zetty, Charlie, Lisa Marie, Shan.
And my family. Especially Boofy. Just to sit beside him and laugh and talk and smell him ~ wafty, deoderant, musky big brother smell.
Am looking at…
Chris’ beautiful instruments in front of me. A guitar, a Peruvian flute, a didgeridoo, a ukelele and a keyboard.
Am in love with…
him. When I kissed him goodnight, I couldn’t stop myself from just looking in his eyes,
blue blue oceans of wonder and depth and love.
with Lile. About friendships, and the icky inbetweens of transitions of those friendships. Wondering out loud if they will last, and how they can be repaired, or if they indeed should be repaired. When to stop holding out a hand if it is not being held in return.
Strong Woman Inspired
by two amazing women on Enough Rope – Olivia Newton John and Arundhati Roy.
Now, sleep calls me.
I bid you adieu.
So I say..
Thank you for the music,
the songs I’m singing
Thanks for all the joy they’re bringing
Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty
What would life be?
Without a song or a dance what are we?
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me.
Thank you all for your words, your encouragement, your love.
Me and Chris went for a drive up to Namadgi National Park this afternoon.
Chris went for a jog up a track while I went on a mini photo adventure…
the bush was just *beautiful* ~ really growing from the last rain.
I really love the last picture ~ just how vibrant yellow the blossoms turned out while the ground looks black and white.
On the drive back, we came across a serendipitous little find ~ The Blue Roof Gallery! It is on the road between Canberra and Namadgi in a clutch of a dozen homes, an antique shop and a cafe by the Murrumbidgee River. The gallery was a lovely simple room filled with precisely picked works ~ my favourite being a monochrome photo of a naked woman lying on a bed of twigs, with her hand laying in front of the camera. Just lovely. The owner gallery was the piece’s maker and such a down to earth being. Yay for serendipitous finds!
A good day in all.
A good weekend.
A good year.
A good life.